So, what I have learned is to 1.) never raise my voice...as I go up, he goes up. 2.) while he is stressing I remind him that I love him 3.) if you are punishing him, ask him what should be done...I often say, what kind of mom would I be if I let you do X. How do you think you should be punished because you know X is wrong.

My son gets so outta control he can be extremely violent. In my experience while he begins to melt we leave him alone. If u consistently try to soothe or talk to him he loses it. If they aren't harming themselves or others or damaging property I would give him a breather. It helps my son tremoundsly

I use music and hugging, or back rubbing or head rubbing