you can be all snuggling and sweet during the night time routine while you are putting him to bed. But each time he gets up, you are being NEUTRAL. not sweet, not mean. Neutral, matter of fact, authority figure.

It took a good week of me sleeping outside his door. Remember don't get drawn into any drama. No words are necessary. Just put it him in his bed. Do it over and over again. He doesn't have to sleep. He just needs to stay in the bed.

Since you have your husband to help, you might want to take turns (alternate nights). But you need to be on the same page and do it the same way. No snuggling, consoling, bribing, threatening, etc. The main thing is that your son needs to know is he's not going to get further than the door.

After the week from hell, you still may need to occasionaly put him back in bed. You'll know when you can quit sitting outside his door... He just needs to know that you mean it. The first time he stays in bed all night, make a big deal of it the next morning and give him a special treat that day.

I think a regular night-time routine is essential for my son. At first he wouldn't stay in bed and would rarely sleep. We were exhausted all the time. Finally, we bit the bullet and decided to enforce him staying in bed. First we made a nice soothing routine. the house is quiet, he takes his bath/shower, we make a big deal about sleeping in his own bed. For the first week, I literally slept in a chair outside his bedroom door. Everytime he got up and came out of the room, I would calmly put him back in his bed. Boy, I wouldn't want to do that again!!! He finally learned to stay in his bed all night whether he was awake or asleep. After we started neurotherapy, he started sleeping a normal night which made it even better! But the night-time routine still remains important.

We established a bedtime routine from a very early age (maybe 6 months old). Bath,massage,book/cuddle time. At 4.5yrs old, my son is like clockwork and oddly enough adjusts a week early before daylight savings change. He has a nightlight that shines stars on the ceiling and a HEPA air filter running (for allergies and white noise). He will usually chat or sing to himself for about 20min than..BAM!...silence. There are some nights where he is wound up and will get out of bed like any other kid testing a stall tactic (need a sip of water, need to pee..so on). I take care of what he needs and escort him back to bed with as little fanfare as possible.

Jill, how long would you say that process took? He hits, kicks,and only wants his daddy, so I feel useless in helping my husband, but something has to change.