I feel your pain I am in the same boat. I am in California and the school district doesn't have anything. I have found a school that deals with our kiddos issues it is called Frostig. I have her IEP this thursday, I hope the team has something to offer us if not I will be pushing Frostig.They work with IEP's.

@A MyAutismTeam Member, here are some of the things I am doing to try and help my son be more pleasant around people - instead of argue, complain and annoy. Teaching him kids jokes, and tongue twisters, rhyme games, trying to play pretend games where I throw in new ideas to incorporate, pointing out people who are sourpusses or have sunny dispositions, talking about why people in movies and books act or react, explaining to him when behaviors make others around him uncomfortable and observing aloud what I think people are intending to do (see Social Thinking by Michele Garcia Winner), helping him develop a habit of cleaning up after himself and working independently. Some of these are right out of the RDI book I mentioned above. My son is old enough and social enough that I need to read the second book with the higher levels. It's a ladder, we have to find our child's current level and gently, playfully coax him to the next. Frankly, I'm not always in a good mood, then I'm useless to him. I just read your story and I see you do these things too and I suspect some days you don't know if it is doing any good. It is. I do it too, but I don't think isolation is the answer. They need to learn to play with other kids their age and we need to be around other people for any of this to be useful in life. Here's the best advice the RDI book I mentioned above gave me. When you introduce a new kid, rely on the simple, old favorite activities that you did as a parent/guide: ball toss, crashing cars, building together, pretending, telling jokes, rhyming games so the pair can work on repairing and creating together in a simple way before trying harder things together.

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A MyAutis...

I agree Evelyn! I think it would benefit a regular preschool classroom as well. After all some children get missed like my son was.
I received the RDA for my son and will go back to hear the results next week. I haven't been on in awhile because I just got back form Chicago. My dear aunt past away on Friday and I drove out to say I love her and to be with her in her transition. My son was able to see her and was amazing with her. He said he loved her and made her laugh and smile. Then her said it was ok because he knew he would see her again someday. I'm so proud of him!

I don't trust the schools to do much (but I am grateful for all they do). @A MyAutismTeam Member, Relationship Development Intervention has a book with activities - you can do these at home. The book even has a checklist for keeping data on progress. I'm reading this book myself now - and trying to incorporate the activities (or similar ones) into my everyday interactions. The name of the book is Relationship Development Intervention with Young Children: Social and Emotional Development Activities for Asperger Syndrome, Autism, PDD and NLD
Steven E. Gutstein (Author), Rachelle K. Sheely (Author). Some of these activities would be EXCELLENT for a preschool autism classroom.

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A MyAutis...

here in ohio we have Summit Academy for Alternative learners.They are wonderful.. but unfortunately due to no transportation my son had to go back to his traditional school.