@MyZettel-I loved your post. I remember when our family first got the diagnosis of autism and everybody was upset, afraid, angry, emotional and just lost. I took one look at all of them after hearing what the doctor said and got right to work...and I.m the grandmother. I went to the library and studied all things autism. Then I treated it like a class that I had to pass and in order to do that, I had to learn everything about it. I started a journal, I have multiple flash drives with information. I started networking with parents, teachers and administrators. I first became familial with preemie.com and then went on from there to autism sites. I went to seminars, I signed up for websites and links that would provide me with information. I got others involved and although its been 6 years since the diagnosis at 6 years old officially, I still find that it is hard but I will never give up. During that time, the twins father left, the twins grandfather left, my family pretty much abandoned me except my sister the nurse, my friends dwindled off, nobody helped and it looked bleek, but I am the "have plan A" and "have plan B" and also have that Easy Button as back up for those. I just turned 59 and somebody walked into the police station this morning and told me I looked the same as I did 16 years ago. I was really flabbergasted, but I thought back when the twins were born and decided then and there that although nobody else wants to help and abandoned them, grandmother never will......

we found trying to avoid backing our daughter into a corner helped end the tantrums... giving two choices, both of which are acceptable to you, helps them feel more in control. it was magic for us but my daughter was maybe 5 when we started... not sure how old your is. we used it all through therapy too, do you want to practice for 2 minutes or 3 minutes... do you want to try 5 times or 6 times? etc. like that

@MyZettel-Funny, but I am still learning new things about autism and other related disorders. Her in the police station, they send us to training's all the time. My most recent training involved special needs children, prevent abuse and police officers. A long time ago, folks did not even think that police officers needed any training on autistic children, adults and teens, special needs or anything like that. My how time has changed all that and thank God for it. I use my training for my home-life dealing with my grand kids with autism as well as my police life. It really does help to know it from both angles. And you can never get too much training. Not all police officers are happy about it, but for those of us who really want to understand it, studying and reading the material and attending the training's always helps.

I treat my boys the same, but handle situations differently. My youngest is more mature than my oldest. So I have to make modifications such as joking around, my youngest gets jokes, my oldest don't. I will give them both instruction on chores i can tell my youngest ok you do this and this but with my oldest i have to break it down one at a time. but he has to do the smae amount as his younger brother. I just have to redirect him whereas I don't his baby brother. He don't get out of things or not get corrected due to his autism. We made a reward board when they were younger. It startecx with getting up in the am all the way through bedtime each day. Each kid had one they both had to have all good marks for the day then at the end of the day we checked it and if they done good a reward was givin, but they had to get good marks on everything for that day. If one didnt do good who ever didnt missed out on the reward. I would redirect most of the time in general not call one or the other out. My youngest is A.D.D and the way I done things because of my oldest's autism actually helped my younger son also.

We parent our children differen