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Church Mass And Attending
A MyAutismTeam Member asked a question 💭

I am wondering if anyone has some techniques that we could do/bring for my autistic son during a Catholic mass. my husband and I are going to start bringing him and I think I'm more worried about how he'll be. just wondering if anyone has used any techniques, story books to prime their child, etc. I have heard of families with autistic children that attend and our Church does have speakers in the courtyard if sitting gets to be too much for children. thank you

posted August 17, 2016
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A MyAutismTeam Member

@A MyAutismTeam Member thank you for sharing, we all have to do what's right for us. either way it's a blessing for him to spend time with his family elders.

posted August 18, 2016
A MyAutismTeam Member

@A MyAutismTeam Member thanks for posting that...it looks like autism speaks has expanded their resources :)

Started listening to this one and I really love it: https://pathways.org/tools-resources/inclusion-...

posted August 18, 2016
A MyAutismTeam Member

I am Lutheran, so our liturgy is similar to that of a Catholic Church, this is good for our son because it's pretty much the same each Sunday.
Church is something that we struggle with every Sunday, but my husband and I decided we would commit to bring him bc if not now, how will we do it later? It's been a struggle for us, some Sundays he actually participates, other Sunday's are (from our perspective) disasters. There have been Sundays where we spent much of the service in the basement listening over the speakers, (but we ALWAYS take him up for communion so he can receive his blessing) on some of those bad days, we get home and he sings the Agnus Dei!
My advice to you is this.

1. Just Bring him. Jesus said to let the children come and I believe he meant our kids too.

2. Have a conversation with your priest. Our pastor has been a MAJOR support for us, he even encouraged me to allow him headphones in church, if that helped him to be there.

3. We have started to use a loose schedule (walk in, sit down, kneel, sing, sit quietly etc) with our son and he earns a treat if he gets more yes than no, this is similar to the schedule we use at home and his teachers use at school.

4. PRAY. I have to remind myself that Colin is God's child and I am only entrusted with him for a little while. I frequently ask God for wisdom and patience in raising him.

Unfortunately, there's very little in the way of social stories and resources to help with church attendance, though I think I found a social story for mass (I'll send it if I find it) I did find that some Catholic parishes have resources for developmental disabilities so maybe contact them.

There's a helpful blog that is run by an Orthodox Christian, our church actually posted her videos on our website. It's called "the least of these" and her name is Maura Oprisko. If you find anything else please sure it with me and let me know if you have other questions.

God Bless you and please just bring him, it will not be easy but it is worth it.
Besides the Agnus Dei, our son also knows the Aposltes creed and The Lord's Prayer, he asks questions about Jesus, and he hums hymns so please don't ever think it's futile faith come by hearing.

When Colin is not in church for whatever reason, people ask for him, they have come to love him, I have not gotten 1 single dirty look or rude comment, we have been treated so lovingly; I think it is helpful that we have been open about Colin having autism and we have responded to questions etc. gracefully. It has been so good for my husband and I to have some cheerleaders.

posted August 17, 2016
A MyAutismTeam Member

Church can even be a struggle sometime for neurotypical children (and adults!) - we have a wonderful special-needs classroom for our children, but if your objective is to have him participate with you in mass, I think I would come up with an action plan with your husband that you both are firmly committed to. I would approach it from several angles: (please understand I don't know your child so this is general from my perspective with a non-verbal 2nd grader):

- familiarity (attend some services from home via livestreaming; play the same music around the house; start with shorter visits and leave before there's a chance for disruption);

- plan of attack (sit by an easy escape route; have things to keep him occupied and distracted; discuss ahead of time with the church if they're not used to having disruptions; see if you can get friends to sit with you so that _when_ there are disruptions you know you're surrounded by people who get it; have stuff in the car in case one of you - and take turns! - ends up sitting in the parking lot while your spouse finishes the worship service)

- set expectations (a countdown timer; discussion about appropriate behavior)

It's been a long time since I've attended a Catholic mass on a regular basis, but no matter what church I attended, I could count on a very similar structure to the service. If that still holds true today, but consistency could actually work well for someone with ASD. My mom had a Catholic upbringing and my dad a Lutheran so we'd alternate each week between the two local churches. The Catholic church welcomed in *severely* mentally handicapped participants -- they would arrive by ambulance and their gurneys were wheeled in and placed in front of the pews and they would make utterances and noise but it wasn't a disruption because it was very clear that ministering to them was important to the church. I hope that you find as welcoming a house of worship at your church!

posted August 20, 2016
A MyAutismTeam Member

@A MyAutismTeam Member thank you for sharing! I think I'm just over worried, you're right.just bring him :).

posted August 18, 2016

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