@A MyAutismTeam Member Aw! that just melted my heart! I help my son to answer questions too. It's hard when he's upset because talking and using too many words make it worse. He kind of does a shut down thing. So I have to speak calm him down first, speak slowly. Then ask him question about the situation. Ex: What is happening right now? Can l help the problem? How? Trying to teach him steps to work through a problem. lt can be difficulty at times because when the emotion takes over, the thinking and motor processes slow way down.
Writing a social story has helped with our son tremendously. He looks at the pictures and connects them to the real places / people once we face the new situation (which is always a source of anxiety for him). Also, we use a lot of essential oils for relaxation (lavender and something called "peace and calming" are awesome for his anxiety and truly "meltdown" tamers). He is getting better at facing challenges and new scenarios.
The first 3-4 yrs my son needed to have a cool down ritual. During these years, I worked very hard at not allowing overstimulation to occur and kept a very structured schedule that included time for him to just do what he wanted which helped him cool down before a melt down occurred. There were lots of outings we could not participate in but I made the best of it. I still keep a close eye on him and can see when he is starting to get over cooked and will internvene quickly by removing him from the situation or environment. I believe that this diligence helps him feel safe and not fear becoming overwhelmed and out of control. He is now 5 1/2 and will ask to take a hot bath right after school which helps him recoup. I also recently added in regular OT appointments where he seems to benefit from a regimen that includes lots of heavy body work. The sessions at first were way over stimulating but now he goes hard and chooses his own cool down without any prompting. Therapeutic horseback riding was also really helpful in keeping him regulated. Now, I am always on the lookout for activities that will keep him engaged and also provide the sensory feedback he craves which has minimized the need for a daily cool down ritual.
My son loves Kermit the Frog. He starts to sing Rainbow Connection that’s how I know he’s feeling overwhelmed. He sings it all the way through then says, ‘That’s better.’
Believe it or not, I have a script that I do with my son on a daily basis to kind of bring him down and get his attention. We have 8 questions that we go through and he knows all of the answers but he likes it so we keep doing it. We will do it about 5 times before he's had enough. It helps my anxiety as well because I know he will be able to answer if he ever runs off or gets lost, etc.
(What's your name? How old are you? Mommy's name? Daddy's name? Brother's name? Where do you live? What's your phone number? What's your favorite color? What's your favorite food?)