I just went through this last year...rough year for us. However, we are doing much better than we were at this time last year.

My son was 3.5yrs at the time we moved away, and I consulted with a child psychologist about what to do. I was told that usually children will ask questions as they have them. Do your best to provide simple, and age appropriate responses. Of course, this doesn't factor in when a child has difficulty communicating.

As a child of divorce myself, I know how important it is to reinforce a sense of security and love. Yes, some things will change but some things will forever remain the same. Be honest, and emphasize the family bond is more than just living in the same house.

I made a social story for my son that talked about all the people who love him. Some people live with him, some live near-by, and some live far away. I put pictures of each person with my son, and photos of where they live so he can get a visual reference. I also addressed that it's okay to feel angry, frustrated or sad that he can't always be with the people he loves. Then, I provided a list of things he can do when he has these feelings (ie- skype, ask for a hug, talk with someone, etc.) My son is still too young to really ask 'why' mommy and daddy are not together, so I made the story address the absence of people and not the divorce itself. In addition to the story, there is a map of the States on his wall and dots on cities where loved ones live.

My best advice is to look forward, and not back. Regardless of who did or said what to contribute to the situation, it is now about the kids and their well being. Our kids deserve our best efforts in life.

Good luck to you, and don't forget to take time for yourself :)