The school is counting on you never figuring out that YOU ARE THE BOSS in this. Under federal law YOU hold the power. As someone above said, get an advocate and fast. Call your local Disability Coalition, they should be able to point you in the right direction to find one. They are bullying you, and hoping you never learn the power you hold. The law says they have to do what's best for your child, whether they like it or not.

Well this makes me so mad you are going to have to go in and ask them to get a new IEP. This way when you sit down you can hash everything out and make sure you get on it what you want. If you don't like what the goals and expectations are then do not sign it. Not sure where you live but there are advocacy groups that provide someone to go with you and do the bullying. If they continue to not follow the IEP you then let them know that it is against the law to not follow her IEP and you will go higher than them. Most of the time when you threaten them with not following a legal document they comply real quick. About the room if she is hurting herself or others they do have to remove her but I would check into how long they are keeping her in that room. It is not to babysit her just to give her some space to calm down. Let me know if there is anything else I can do....

Been there - it was not until we hired a Special Ed advocate and then a Lawyer that we got what we needed. Also keep records of the days your child is sent home and the impact to you (financial and otherwise) as it can be used by the Advocate / Lawyer later to get reparations in a hearing.

I would start by asking why they aren't providing the environment for her to succeed. That's their job. If she's acting out it's a sign they're not doing their job. Their failure, not hers. She should not be alone in a room. And everyone is right, you have the power. Most parents don't realized this. As suggested, check advocacy groups. In my area we have Autism Ontario which helps families. See if you have something similar.

I had a similar situation with my son. But you have more rights and more aid in the US than we do here in Russia. I mean we have rights but nobody keep them. The situation depends on people you meet in this certain school. Be strong!