Talking back is kind of a blessing in disguise as it’s an age appropriate behavior. She is wanting to be independent and make her own decisions. No suggestions except they do better when given two choices instead of being told no and then not being given any options for what they can do. “You can do this or that. Which do you want to do first?” If there’s sensory issues making her not want to participate at all (like taking a shower), you might need therapy and services to help her.

I don’t know which life skills you are working on with her, but I found this. You can give her choices and go from there. Good luck.
https://www.busykidshappymom.org/life-skills/3/

My son is about to start comprehensive school and he’s non verbal at moment, so it’s difficult to know what he wants or needs but at home we manage perfectly well with the phrase and reward chart, then ever 10 stickers he gets he gets a small toy, he understands perfectly and we are making progress with him following my instructions, eg, go & get your shoes please Harry, and he does so he gets a sticker on his chart, so it working well at home but going out is a different story, he does sometimes do as I ask but definitely not inside shops. So I’m trying to implement the same strategy outdoors but he’s not quite got the hang of it yet. Good luck