In my experience It is the consistency at each place. If things are always on the same schedule when they are at your home, they will learn it well. As long as it is really consistant, every time they are there they will know exactly what to expect and when. It is just like when they start a new therapy...it is rough for a few weeks until they know it is a safe schedule (meaning it won't vary). Best of luck!

Hang in there! It's not easy! Especially if he's just not interested. My son struggles with this, so we are looking into an IEP currently for behavour. He CAN do it...his IQ was tested at 161. He just doesn't like it. We went online to find some things to get him interested. We signed him up for the schools science fair and that help a TON with science. He dislikes math, though very good at it, because he has to explain HOW and WHY things are the way they are...hard for him. He DISPISES reading and language...this year they are working on how to write paragraphs and stories, journaling, etc...he can't think that way. Little imagination :( His therapist is working with the school to help him out a best as she can, but an IEP will be the best 'solution' for him. It's hard to know what is 'normal' boy behavour and what is 'autism' behavour.

Thank you Michelle for your comments and for the excellent reference. I think you have an important point. Tom is very much the adored "baby" of the family with Mum, Dad and HFA older sister all laughing affectionately at his lack of organisation etc. When he sulks or whines, Dad in particular turns himself inside out trying to find out what is wrong, rather than ignoring him. Tom will also try to use his autism as an excuse for not being able to do something, despite being told it makes a difference not an excuse. He is very immature emotionally of course (about 4 - 5 yrs old emotionally, I would guess). I am going to emphasise ignoring poor behaviour totally and offering choices e.g. will we do addition or subtraction today? reading first or spelling first etc. Excellent advice, thanks again.

Positive Behavior Supports will help you set up activities with positive motivators for doing certain activities. What you have to do, is start with the behavior you want to change, such as having him butter his own toast. Set up a reward he'd like, then tell him that if he butters his toast himself, he can have the reward. Start off by encouraging him all the way through the process with verbal rewards like, "It's great that you're doing this!", "Way to go!" "Look at that! You did it!" and so on. Then phase these out gradually. Then phase the reward out gradually. You can use PBS to exterminate many unwanted behaviors if you set it up correctly. The key to success is a) understanding exactly what the behavior you want to change is (sometimes kids do a thing, like whine or complain if there's something else bothering them. You have to get to the root to have effective change). Then be VERY VERY VERY consistent with the process. Don't deviate from the rewards or forget them. Don't deviate from the plan once you get it in place. There may be an extermination burst - an increase in negative behavior - at the start of the change but hang in there and see it through. YOu'll get the positive result you're looking for if you keep with it, be gently encouraging and don't let your own emotions and frustration show.

I'm sorry. That was very long. I hope it helps, though.

As a reading specialist I encounter this all the time. I think it's best if we work with what motivates the kid - for avg kids and asd kids, but asd kids are just MORE this way. So if a kid doesn't move with imagination, go with nonfiction. The hows and whys of what works. One option is to buy nonfiction books at used book stores, yard sales, but be picky. DK Kindersly books (go with the younger kids variety) Time for Kids, and the You Wouldn't Want to Be series are all great. The You Wouldn't Want to Be incorporates imagination and fact, as does Ms. Frizzle and the Magic Schoolbus series. There are websites for Ms. Frizzle and online games/quizzes, too.

I have sometimes read aloud in the vicinity of nonreaders, and then left them at a cliffhanger - but only if the book is at their independent level - meaning they don't have to struggle at all to read it. I call these "potato chips" books - you want to just kick back w/a cup of coffee (us!) or a bag of chips or something and relax. Kids need to identify boooks as a fun thing, not eating their vegetables. So...the first thing is to find what they care about and get books about that. Are they investigating ant hills? poking at old computer disks you've allowed them to disembowel? time for books about those things, on a very easy level. If you want recs. for specific books, email me at [[email: [[email: [[email: (Email address can only be seen by the question and answer creators) I also have a website with lots of nonfiction sites, games, lists of books, too - www.amylesemann.com It's my teaching site, so no ads. Good luck! Amy