I'm sorry he had to go through that, but very happy he was able to stand up for himself and help educate people. My son told me a few kids mentioned it to him during lunch and he simply said "the Aspergers had nothing to do with it. That GUY had everything to do with it. I have Aspergers and I'm nothing like him, you know that" The ended the conversation right there. I was also proud of my son :) We do have wonderful children.

Great resource here http://www.autismspeaks.org/newtown-resources/c...

My son also deals in concrete. What is and is not in the rules. Our doctor told us when he was diagnosed to never lie to him, it will distroy his trust in us. Which is a very difficult thing to do when a loved one is sick or in situations like this. We have been told by a former Marine that our son (he is in Marine ROTC at his school) would be able to enlist but would NEVER be put in any type of combat situation. His sensory issues (which cannot be controlled)would mean life or death to a fellow marine or cilvian. Which means it's likely to believe your son would not be able to be a sniper. I feel you should find a way to be honest with him. His obsession is a difficult one that you will have to deal with honestly also. Reality is, it's an obsession that could make people nervous even before the school tragedy. Maybe there is something else that can be done aside of this research thing your therapist is suggesting. Even if it is just to show her that not all asperger kids are the same. People seemed nervous when my son at age 11 could tell you everything there was to know about all types of combat planes and loved a show called "Dogfights" (about airbourne combat) on the history channel. I can only imagine what you are dealing with now. Age appropriate honesty is one of the hardest things to find/do but has worked for us for 15 yrs now.

I definately agree that it is not an us vs them situation but I can't help but to worry about my son. I've seen the way people look at him, I've heard the comments adults and kids his age have said about him, I've seen the way kids he goes to school with react when he's around. I think it's natural to worry and want to find a way to help keep him safe without drawing more attention to the school shooting than the media has already done. I know for my son specifically, it's hard for him to detect when someone he believes is a friend or acquaintance is acting differently. Kids have been cruel to him in the past then turned around and said "dude, it's alright, I'm just messin with ya" and my son accepts that as not being bullied because they say their just joking, didn't mean any harm. My son takes things at face value.

I will definately pass on any good advice. I'm still hoping for some. That said, I would contact that therapist and request a solid reason as to why she suddenly wants you to send your son for research study. She should have a more personalized reason before you even consider it. My son doesn't show empathy either, although at home he will talk about things effect him. Part of my concern is that since he is "in his own world" he doesn't catch alot of what people say or how they are actually treating him.