different counties/states do them differently. your school's website might have the forms that you can atleast see. I know Stafford County schools ,does. basically it should be VERY clear and precise to everyone what the behavior is, why it is happening (function), and what the reaction or prevention should be. And if it is a consequence (not just a prevention, something that could be "adult will show Billy visual timer five minutes before recess is done, and every minute there after") then it needs to be something that everyone/anyone can (and will) enforce. I have seen some pretty bad BIPs and FBAs...might want to suggest your school or you can look into "behavior doctor" website it is an AWESOME FBA tool. GOOD LUCK

or if this a frequent enough occurance that is changing his educational setting or accomedations (sensory diet) then you need to have a meeting with the school and do an FBA (functional behavioral assessment), and come up with a BIP (behavior intervention plan), everyone working with you child will by law be required to follow the BIP. Attention seeking behaviors are hard but a good behavior plan (contract, consequence/reinforcers) are very successful!

I think it depends. I hold my 9 year old austic son to very high standards, nearly as I would another child his age, especially when out in the community. However, I think teachers, parents, community memebers needs to explain things sometimes in different ways, with different meaningful consequences and reinforcers when needed. Sometimes accomedations can take care of 'discipline' problems (extended wait time, visual/gestural reminders, functional breaks, ect). good luck

I don't feel like I have enough information to make a call on your particular situation. However I will make this general statement - I believe that discipline for high functioning children should be kept to a very standard. If your ultimate goal for your child is to hopefully some day live independently and have a job then making too many exceptions and modifications will not benefit them in the future.
Again this isn't specifically directed at you and your son, just a general statement.

I called the director of special education and spoke to her about my concerns. She is sending her behavioral specialist out to watch my son at lunch, recess and in the hall not only in the classroom. Now I will see if this actually happens. I know what the antecedents are to his behaviors. I want to see if they agree with me and if they are willing to put a positive consequence in place instead of a negative one. He is high functioning enough to know what feels good to him and what feels bad. I don't care if they say it is a good consequence my son has to agree that it is. I don't want to be a problem but I do want my son to have a good experience in a public school with very few autistic children and teachers who do not understand autistic behaviors.