My grandson is 6.5. I somehow learned to anticipate meltdowns. I know what may trigger it and do anything to prevent it. Many parents know what to expect in different situation. In my experience, I talk to him about 30 minutes before we leave. Where do we go, what will we do and that I expect him to be a good boy. Then I say that if he behaves, he would have smth he loves (ice cream, walk in the park, etc) It works in our case. Best of luck to all with strategies. The other thing I would like to share is that when he demands smth and is about to meltdown, I never tell him no. I say that I know what he wants and there is no problem We will first do whatever we are doing and then he may have it. It works as well. I think they do not want to hear NO from us.

I agree with what you have been doing. Being exhausted is "part of" autism, the deep pressure you are doing with holding him really is helpful, & I learned from my son's teacher that patting him on the back firmly (and I do mean firmly, like your burping a baby but harder) works wonders, the brushing does help too but that is done of course when he's NOT in a melt down...lol. Anything to divert his attention from the meltdown, He has things he uses for comfort during regular times and I have these accessible, his favorite Blanket, favorite hot wheels, his favorite movie on his portable DVD player. After one or more of these begin to settle him down I talked to him and tell him he's okay several times. After the meltdown is officially over we reward with a few minutes of a tickling time. his meltdowns are getting less frequent and don't last as long! Disappearing completely....I doubt it, I still have them...Lol.

I used to applaud him in a real loud, exaggerated way and he would just look at me in a puzzled manner and stop.It worked for me.Also you can try a social story,those go a long way too.I tried both.Good luck!

I would ask his therapists ways you can try to calm him. My son when he is mad he goes to his quiet spot and I know that doesn't work with everyone but it does with him. He used to have those meltdowns a lot for awhile and now he doesn't so much. I know how you feel though very frustrating

I agree with others, finding the cause and trying to diffuse it before it comes to a meltdown. My son will have them when tired, hungry, and also when told no about something he wants, or when we don't understand what he wants. I can usually see them comming. When he has one we send him to a quiet spot first. I let him stay as long as he needs. If after a few minutes he is still crying I know I have to help him calm down. That is when the distraction occurs. Tonight it was reading him one of his favorite stories. Sometimes movies or computer will work. Some times treats, bubbles, massage, wrapping in a blanket, blanket swings. Also his Dad is amazing at calming him in a meltdown if he is home when it occurs. There are several books and tools that help you track the meltdown and what caused it and suggestions on how to diffuse it or prevent it. I would talk to any and everyone on your case to help you with this. My son is only 6 now so I don't know what the teenage years will bring. Good luck. I will pray for you. And yes I pray for wisdom that can only come from the Lord in the middle of meltdown situations. God Bless.