It does sound like you're seeing "red flag behaviors". It's definitely worth having him evaluated. A developmental pediatrician or pediatric neurologist are generally the doctors to look for. You can just call their office and ask if they do autism diagnosis. He's so young right now that you have some time to get him early intervention to help him get on the right path.
The biggest thing for you to remember is that if he has autism, its not the end of the world. It doesn't necessarily mean that he won't ever lead a "normal" life. He might have some extra challenges but he could very well flourish with early intervention and just grow up to be quirky. He sounds a lot like one of little guys. At 5 he has now almost overcome his diagnosis and while he may always be a little odd, he's going to be fine.
This is a scary time for you but try to keep your head on straight and remember that there are very effective therapies. It sounds like he had a lot of strengths going for him!
I won't say "don't worry" but I can tell you it will be ok. This is a great place to get advice and encouragement as you go through this hard time.

My son, who's 7 now, sounds a lot like your son at that age. My son was verbally delayed (really talking after 3 and then unintelligible speech), had outbursts, couldn't play with others, trashed his room, banged the walls, didn't play with toys appropriately, ran through parking lots, understood what I said but ignored me, wouldn't sleep at night, generally fussy, etc.

Long story short, after seeing a developmental ped and psychiatrist he was finally diagnosed at Emory around age 4. I knew in my gut that he had autism, but was hung up on the non eye contact, flapping, etc. that are usually associated with autism. My son is the overly active, defiant kind.

One thing that helps is to keep a list of everything he does so you can put the pieces together. I would see if your insurance covers a developmental ped. Most regular peds have no clue. I feel for your struggle.

,,,,,,,one test may not be the end-all, be-all. Again, mama knows best.

This sounds like my son at that age. I was a first time mom so I just assumed he was slow to talk. My pediatrician didn't notice even though I repeatedly said he was not talking like my friends children. Finally she had me and Braden sent to a pediatric psychologist. She diagnosed him with autism right away. We were in denial and had 2 more evals. He is a very bright, loving, affectionate boy with great eye contact. He has autism nevertheless. We are now in Preschool full time and has tutoring ABA and educational 3x a week after school. It's a lot and I feel terrible because he is always so tired after the day but I know he needs this and its the best thing for him. He has improved a lot in the past 2 years. I hope this helps!

Go with your gut because you know best. I was so convinced that my son didn't have autism 18 months ago that I think I actually convinced the doctor of the same. As my son got a little older the symptoms were more pronounced and obvious and he has now been diagnosed with Aspergers/Autism. Honestly, autism sounds scary but it is a blessing for me. I know what it is and I can tackle this head on. Good luck! But please keep a watchful eye over the coming years because a