On thing I wondered was does you son have Constipation issues- 80 % of ASD kids have that,,,Or something physically making him irritated. We could track my sons behavior to the length of time he went without a BM... yep ,after 6 or 7 days his defiance went through the roof. we use pro-biotices- acidophilus- vitimins and mirolax was necessary along with magniseum/ calcium and D and B vit.

Visual tools would be great for him too! The sticker lesson, was a visual tool we used for our kids to deal with emotional resilience, that is key, to help them get centered when the teasing is going on .. and staying in his own bubble, Don't pop your sisters bubble or your friends bubble demonstrate everyone has one ( Use bubbles) also key phrase words that you use all the time, consistently , I used the Phrase with my children , We do not leave the store till we are Calm, Quiet and Friendly. I also have sat with my children after school for miss- behavior and stated that if they took the teachers time I would take there time, and that seemed to work, we of course looked into any physical issues that may have been causing the behavior but when that is established that it is defiance then you have to be just as tactical as they are.

I believe I have the sticker lesson posted on a few other sites I will pull that if your interested, it worked with and in many school system.

I think you're right. We had been doing ABA with a therapist until my son started this program last year. Then we stopped because he was getting a lot of help at school. But it is clearly not enough now.

Social stories and redirection are great tools but they're only one part of the equation. This is where getting some ABA could really help you. Especially because any good ABA program is going to include parent training. It really is more of a lifestyle than just a therapy. I think it could help you and your child a lot.

Thanks so much for your comments. When school started this year, he was having trouble with another little boy on the spectrum. The kid is really sweet, but he was constantly in my son's face yelling, and bumping into him a lot. Then he started teasing some of the kids by calling them Baby and Stinky. The teachers were really good about managing the situation with social stories and giving my son his space. I'm told they even play together nicely now. But I think the situation soured him on school a bit. he seems more fixated this year on what's hard about school and less on all the fun stuff. I'm hoping he'll settle down into it as the school year progresses, but we'll see. Maybe it's just a long day for the little guy. So hard to know.

As for how the teachers manage his behavior, they do a lot of social stories and redirecting. I feel like I'm in need of some training in this department. I'm great with social stories, but the moment to moment management is much more difficult for me. Especially when he fights with his two year old sister or is suddenly very angry. I guess I don't really have a consistent strategy and that is probably exacerbating the whole situation.