My oldest son had some violent behavior for awhile. My best advice is look at the behavior before think hard. Is there a time before that is stressful? Not to just to you but mainly to him. If you can sit down with him ask him what can he or you do to alleviate the situation. Explain what may happen if he acted on the situation in a violent way. How he might hurt some one. How you or others may feel about him or the the person he hurt. That police may need to be involved. Consequences He might be taken away or maybe you. In this part of the scenario look for something that he cares about. We used to tell my son they would take him away from the family and he thought for while it would be okay. Then we pointed out he may not be able to take his games or clothes. He might have to change schools. No telling what the other people would be like. He wouldn't be allowed to see us or anyone for a while that he may want to be with. I even went as far as to show him how his brother and sister might get teased because of his behavior . How they would miss him because a hole would be created where he was meant to be. Yeah I used guilt trip 101.This lat part is important because you have to find them interested in being in the family. It's part of the reward for looking for them being good and givng positive reinforcement even if its just a smile. Say I like talking. or thanks for just listening. I need help too. Hope this helps.

I just wanted to chime in that you are not alone. My son is 6 1/2 and for several months now has been making threats to hurt himself or his sister. He went so far as to grab a knife once when he said he was going to kill her. Thankfully I heard the drawer open and screamed at him, we will never know what could have happened. He says things like he wishes he were dead, he wishes his sister was in Heaven already, he has tried to choke himself, he hits himself, bangs his head into the wall, etc. We have a psychiatrist and a psychologist for him and they have no advice other than to tell him it is unacceptable behavior and follow through with punishment on it. We have talked about how we may have to call the police if it continues and if he hurts himself or someone else, he will be put in the hospital and they might take him away from us because we can't take proper care of him. He says maybe that would be best because he is such a bad boy. I don't want to lose my son, but I don't know what to do about the constant aggression either. The slightest thing makes him so angry, he hits and kicks his sister multiple times a day. If it is not her he is angry at, he will hit himself or threaten harm to himself, like saying he should just jump out the window because he is so bad. We have gone over how he is not a bad boy, he just makes bad choices, which we all do, but he needs to learn to control himself and make better choices. He says his brain won't let him, that it makes him do and say bad things. Good luck to you, I truly hope you find some help! Sorry for the long post, just wanted to share what we are going through as well.

Hi BillieZin, When did this behavior start? How old is the youngest? Dealing with children like ours; you need to examine everything around you. Make a journal with dates, time, as far back as you can remember., i.e.., What changes occurred, new meds, his school, his friends, what he is watching on TV or internet, anything you can remember, jot it down. even if you think its irrelevant; it may be the main cause of the behavior. Turn to your state for help and get a case manager who can then set you up with services and a BCBA (Board Certified Behavior Analyst) I wish you the best of luck. You made the first step by reaching out to My Autism Team Website. You will find great people here who will understand and not judge. Please let us know how thing are going.

You may have to do this several times. But just keep reminding yourself he wasn't always like this and remind him that the family needs him because weird is good. Dysfunctional functional family s need all the members good or bad.

This is a tough situation but you have to get it under control before he gets bigger and stronger and can really hurt someone.

I know I will hear the comments but meds might be the answer here. Also you need behavioral therapy as well. If all this fails and this is not going to be an overnight fix it is going to take a while, residential services may be needed in extreme cases.

Residential is a last resort but you cannot have your family at risk if he starts hurting them.