I have a son who went through a bout of aggressive behavior physically and verbally around that age.It was hard to distinguish if it was the teenager in him coming out or the autism. I tolerated the abuse, most of the time blaming it on the autism and that he couldn't help it. I have a boyfriend who would not tolerate it either way. We starting having "table time" for discussions of good and bad situations. It gave calm time for my son to discuss any issues he was having and we would try to help with positive comments and advice. Suggestions were given on how he could deal with the anxiety. He was made aware that autistic or not everyone has times of anger. It must be controlled. The meeting was scheduled and never cancelled. Any topic was discussed and any of us could talk. No yelling was allowed. Strict rules of the household were put in place. The rules were enforced and were to be followed by punishment of no reward of game time,...etc. if he did not communicate or act appropriately at any time. It made a big difference!

We are dealing with similar things. Our son will turn 12 in May. Puberty hit a couple of months ago, and all challenges increased. He has severe ADHD plus intellectual challenges, but his verbal skills skew his IQ. He started public school this year after 3 and a half years of homeschooling with tutoring. Sorry for rambling; just joined here and am glad to know we aren't The only ones. Cursing, rudeness, defiance, noises, emotional disconnection.... but with us and not at school... Lately I cry every night.

My son is turning 13 and I am dealing with some of the same behaviors. If he doesn't get his way he will start yelling at us and swearing, saying the most hurtful things he can think of. It is so exhausting and heart breaking. Just know you are not alone

@A MyAutismTeam Member I believe this is an excellent system you have!
Conditions and forfeights made onnthe calm are much much more understood and digested than during the heated argument!
Have any of you guys ^^^^ thought some foods may trigger our ASD kids behaviours I have just started to look into Biomed and reading "Psychology and the Gut Syndrome" available on eBay or Amazon second hand etc...
Foods can trigger off levels in the gut and blood that make our kids act out. Even trigger those with mental health issues.
- side note, should our kids be allowed to come off a med, it's so dangerous just to stop...is it wrong to slip them into meals? It probably is isnt it?

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A MyAutis...

@A MyAutismTeam Member We doubt he would go willingly to the hospital. If he gets too violent, we would call an ambulance & have them take him in. This begs the question of where is the threshold of tolerance...