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My son is 3 years old and is nonverbal. When I have had to cut his nails I always have to have help with what feels like restraining him and I don't like that at all. I have tried to do while he was asleep but he woke up as soon as I clipped the first one and began to get upset.
@A MyAutismTeam Member is right on the money with all that was said. Remember, they can scence everything. When we show fear and nervousness it's like taking a gallon of gas and throwing it on the fire. Keep as calm as possible. And yes, clip your own in front of him. When he does good with observation commend left and right. That will put a boost in confidence, ease his mind. When clipping his nails just keep reminding him it's all fine. And that the more he fights it the longer it will take. You can even use cartoon characters he likes who shows courage and takes on challenges. Use them as examples, role models. In time it will ease down. Confidence and calmness go hand in hand.
Do you feel nervous when you go to cut his nails? Don't be surprised if he can sense that. If so, then he may be feeling that and may be worried that he will get hurt - even though I know you don't intend to.
What you need to do is ease him - and you - into it. Practice by holding his hand - just as you would if you were walking hand in hand. It's important that you both feel at ease.
After that, model how you cut your own nails to him. Be sure to do it slowly and methodically so that he sees that you are in control and that there is no cause for concern about getting hurt. In time, he should take some interest and may be receptive to having you cut one of his nails. If he does so, be sure to praise and reward him.
It's important not to push him or be impatient. Let him decide how long he submits to the activity. In time, he should overcome any anxiety he's feeling and become more compliant.
BTW, it's probably a good opportunity to work on his fine motor skills as well. Have him use the clippers on something, like a thin sheet of plastic. That way he can see how little force is needed to be exerted using the tool.
OT can help. Find something your son loves to do, and if possible, let him do a small amount of that activity after every nail.
Very good advice above. Talk to OT and or ABA about this. My son goes in/out of tolerating. We first started by doing exposure...just taking turns tapping the clippers on our finger tips for a few days. Modeling and then his turn. It helped him not pull away the second he saw the clippers come out or go near his hands. Then we got to one nail. Eventually built up...also after a bath/shower always better bc nails are soft. Lots of improvements we’ve seen but always a work in progress 🙃
Terrific advice👍🤗
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