We found a dentist who was very patient and good at building trust and respectful, but also I told them when not to push him. I stood in the room and if he started looking upset, we stopped and ended the cleaning that day even if we didn’t clean the teeth. And for the first five visits we never used toothpaste as he could not tolerate it. The first time we went, he got to play with the instruments and we kept it light- they did not try to work on him much, just asked him how many teeth he had and had him hold a mirror to show him how many as he counted the teeth with the scraper. When we first went, I asked to go four times a year so that he would not forget. I paid cash for a couple of visits and it was worth it. We went the other day for the first time in six months, and he went back by himself for the first time, and had a good time and let him put toothpaste on his teeth. It also helps that they give him toys. If the dentist office doesn’t give toys, maybe bring some for after the visit to give her. I am pretty sure he goes just for that- it’s also the only reason he likes McDonald’s.