Have you tried genuine sign language? Although the link is extremely helpful for some in the similar situations described in the post, I feel it does not apply to your kid. This issue seems quite separate from the link.
Hmmm… what other links have you searched for auditory sensory?

Thank you, I appreciate any suggestions. I did try Google for possible help, but came up mostly dry. For a short period using the technique of counting and finger touching to distract her brain worked, but not for very long. Maybe what I'm looking for is calming techniques. Like you said it's always a guessing game, so maybe I just asked the wrong question. Thank you again for your help.

@A MyAutismTeam Member, maybe a visual instructions will be the best.

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A MyAutis...

It's the Phrasing and the Tone.
Phrase it 'Technically' and use a 'DeadPan' Tone.
Never put any feelings in with the instructions, it just muddies the communication and loses value for them.

I am so sorry you feel you have nowhere to turn. I only suggested the links or doing some research for that exact reason. Not everyone is going to understand. Sometimes we have to be the answers for our kids. We have to be the ones to play the guessing game when it comes to their needs and wants especially when there isn’t anyone to help. We have had to do that for our son during his whole process to understand him. That is why I suggested it. Again, I am so sorry your having these struggles. I hope things get better or that you find the support you’re looking for. Sending positive energy. 🫶🏼