As a child I had a friend who totally blew the Santa secret and I was devistated, but my mother explained to me that Santa didn't visit Sarah because she didn't believe, when you stop believing Santa no longer comes. I like Santa so I chose to believe, well at least for a few more years anyways. I just assumed that those kids who did not believed were really missing out.

My kids know that he's not real, but they hopefully are considerate enough not to spill the beans to other kids. At least I hope so.

I choose to not discuss Santa with my daughter. We talk about Christmas and presents. Santa is just a man in a costume. Most people hate me for that but my daughter does not understand anything she doesn't see. She doesn't understand the tooth fairy and the Easter bunny either. I can't tell her know that Santa will bring her presents and then in a few years tell her "sorry but Santa doesn't really exist" because she won't get it!

We had this problem with our son. Our daughter still believed, we also believe in the spirit of Christmas and that yes Santa was a real person, but Mom and Dad put the present in your stocking. We practiced by play acting that I was our daughter and he was not to spoil her belief that Santa was real. It took lots of practice. I would talk about Santa coming. He was just about to burst to not tell me and sometimes he would blurt it out when we practiced. He made it through Christmas, but one of the kids at school told her and she was quite distraught. It is a difficult concept. In retrospect, I had really wished that we had been more realistic with her even when the older kids and grandparents promoted the concept of Santa.

I tried to explain the how saint nicholas thing with her and that's how she came up with santa being dead. I've been giving her that look to but she misses the social cue. I get the look from other parents like are you kidding me.