Our ABA therapist encourages us to narrate his life first person when we can. For example, in the bath, I say, "Daddy's washing my face. Now Daddy is rinsing my face. I'm going to brush my teeth next." Or, at dinner, "I'm going to eat all my bananas next."

I know, it sounds a little kooky. I don't do it out in public much, and we don't do it all that often, but when we're trying to get him to do tasks, it's a great way to get him to understand what we're asking him to do. Now, if I'm struggling to get him into his PJs, I'll say, "I'm putting my left foot into the pants." And he'll repeat it after me.

His unprompted, unscripted, contextually-appropriate language has improved dramatically since we started doing this. More importantly, he understands the meanings of what he and we are saying better.

Learning and comprehending language can be difficult for any child, but is more so with a child that is on the spectrum. With my son, we found that if he could see, feel and touch an object he was more likely to associate language with it. The objects we used had to be ones he was interested in and we could then expand from that. Encourage the use of all the senses to develop language.

What I do with my son is tape the flash cards to whatever it i(if possible) is. This way he can see, start to recognize, and also be able to interact with the words that tell him what "this" is and how to spell it!!!....ur doing fine but also allow him the opportunity to also learn on his on while he is walking around the house.

Visual cues helped my daughter much better than verbal cues . For example, to,make her stay In her own bed at night, I colored her favorite teddy on a poster board,and put stars every time she stayed . At the end of a,week ,we would go out,for a treat.

Remember when dealing with a child on the Spectrum, all learning and developmental markers go out the window. If you have a 3 year old that will actually follow directions enough to work on flash cards, he is doing very well. Try to look at what IS HAPPENING instead of what ISN'T. Focus on the positive and find a way to build on that. We found that working with what our daughter could do, lead her to do more.
PRACTICE DRILLS
Try having PRACTICE DRILLS on things that he is having a hard with. "Let's practice putting the book on the shelf." Take one book and show him what to do, then have him do it. Clapping, hugs, rewards of kisses, shaking hands, etc. really help with internalizing the behavior. You can do it with any thing that he needs to learn-coming to the table when called-putting toys in the toy box-giving a hug to someone-putting dirty clothes in the right place. You find a way for him to repeatedly do something that needs to be learned at a time when you can practice that skill without pressure to perform. Lots of praise is very important.
Try putting the flash cards on a surface and ask him to "PRACTICE" getting the shoe or apple or dog card and bringing it to you. Knowing the flash cards is a big step so reward him, even if he is just repeating back what you said.
POSITIVE REWARDS
They say that for each negative thing said to a child we have to say 100 positive things to counter-act that negative. Put him in a position to get rewards easily. If he isn't ready to handle something, move on to something else. My daughter-in-law is always saying to my grandsons "Good listening skills" when they do something she asks them or "Good brother skills" when they help each other. They respond so well to that and feel good about themselves. She focuses on what the did that was positive, even if she had to ask more than once.
My daughter is 19 and is HF Autistic, but she still has problems with things like time and money (more than a normal teen would). So we have worked out how to deal with these issues and not focus on the deficit, but focus on the positive of how well she can play the flute, or how kind she is to others. Somethings don't "take" like we want them to, just move on and revisit that at another time.
Wow, that was long!!!!