I am an adult on the spectrum . I went through the same thing. When I was done with that phase, I moved on to the concept of love, and what I loved. I did it because I didn't understand concepts that reflected emotion. It was easier for me to study and relate those concepts that were polar opposites. I wasn't at the time aware that that was why I was doing it, or why I needed to do it, but that's what I got from it as I went along. The "love concept phase" is a little easier to bear. Encourage discussion by asking questions. I always wanted some one to ask me why I felt hatred towards whatever I was hating at the time. Mostly because I felt like I couldn't say why until someone prompted me by asking questions. Sometimes it would lead to conversations and sometimes it would lead to arguments and sometimes it would lead to complete meltdowns . The best thing you can do is try to navigate through with your child and try to level with your child as much as possible. God bless and good luck !

As parents, we always need to be careful not to reinforce negative behaviors. We don't realize sometimes that reacting is reinforcing.

All too often, we forget to reward the wonderful things our kids do. But then, when they do something self-destructive, we rush in and try to “fix” it. Without even thinking, we have given them more love and attention for hurting themselves.

So the first thing to do is figure out if he really has a bad self image, or if he is just saying those things because he knows it touches you so deeply. It doesn't sound like this is what is going on, but it is always the first thing to worry about.

Second, keep a close eye on when he makes such statements. If it is a time of high emotion and anxiety, then you might want to keep the response to a minimum until later. Set aside some time to deal with it when he is thinking more clearly.

Third, when ASD kids first become aware of how different they are, it can be amazingly hard. They spend large parts of every day just wishing things were easier. There are no easy solutions to this kind of dissatisfaction, but he may grow out of it. As he gradually realizes that he is very good at some things, he may build his own self esteem.

I have heard that people with ASD are much more likely to feel depression, both transient and long-term. It is a condition to take seriously, and will require a long-term approach to work properly.

An ASD child who has done something 'bad', frequently believes they are a 'bad' person. They are confusing the behavior with what they are. They might even say they hate themselves. They might feel like they are not in control of their impulses, so when they do something bad, it makes them feel guilty and stupid.

It is a very tricky lesson to teach, because we can't 'fix' self-esteem just by disagreeing with them. We can explain to them that we don't see them that way, but they 'feel' their own opinion, not yours.

In modern therapy, you ask the person to write down ten things they like about themselves. (They have to write it down, by the way, not just mumble it.) If they can't think of ten, you can help. But be careful doing it for them, because it has to ring true to them. If it sounds false to them, then it is more empty words with no 'feel.'

Eventually, people with ASD will realize that they can make friends, they can contribute a lot to their relationships and to others, and that there is a great value in being honest, being kind, and being helpful. People who can learn to develop real long-term relationships can usually overcome depression.

Almost everyone can create their own meaning, their own list of things to be grateful for, and their own happiness. It is not magic, but it is possible.

I know a lot of parents do not think this way and think that they should tell their child about their condition because they say there is nothing to be ashamed of , however this is exactly the reason we have never told our 8 year old he is ASD. He is on the less severe side of the spectrum but is really a few years behind his peers. The other thing is while he is very intelligent and had a photographic memory he is very sensitive and caring and something like knowing he is different is going to bother him.

All of his teachers and Dr's have agreed not to tell him unless we have to. He does not bring it up much but when he asks why he has to be in the ESE class or does some summer school we tell him some children need a little extra help in school and they are just making him smarter.

We have a 7 year old daughter who is severe ASD and she does not have the ability to comprehend these things and is non verbal so this actually helps with my some because we always tell him he does not need to do things his sister does and doesn't need the special school his sister does and this usually gets him from asking more

Another thing to look at would be a physical issue causing this behavior reference issues with Yeast

http://youtu.be/P6fQeGqsHrk. this may be something you want to explore as a cause of the behavior as well

Well said Dave