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Is There A Way To Prevent Or Calm Down A Meltdown?
A MyAutismTeam Member asked a question 💭

how do you handle a meltdown? is there a way to calm them down or defuse them? if you see one coming on is there a way to prevent them. Also when there in a meltdown is there a way to help them calm down and come out of the meltdown? my son has several a day and i would like to help him through this

posted September 1, 2013
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A MyAutismTeam Member

Generally there is a trigger and you have to find out what that is, and most likely there is more than one. Some children also have what is called internal triggers and those are hard if not impossible to stop.

Once the child is in meltdown you can try to redirect first but do not push it to hard. If this does not work back off and as long as they are not hurting themselves let them work through it.

You may also need a combination of meds and ABA to prevent this, but this does not mean drugging them to be a zombie just enough to get the job done. If your child has sound and light sensory issues as triggers you are going to have to address that and modify your home for that. This is not possible in public but I would avoid bringing the child somewhere they are going to have issues.

I know this is not as simple as it sounds but a lot of us can tell you that you are going to have to go without and sacrifice for your child sometimes so if that means not going to places or events, even family ones it had to be done. If people do not understand so be it they do not have to deal with what you do and I do not have time in my life for these kind of people.

posted September 2, 2013
A MyAutismTeam Member

These answers are great.. Do some reading on ABA therapy...rewarding positive behavior (we have a bag of gummy bears which we use) "aiden, if you are a good boy in the store you can have a gummy bear". It's really helped my son and my family come up with daily strategies for these types of situations, and has taught my son how to make good choices. Generally, a meltdown is just a child's way of dealing with frustration at not being able to communicate what it is they're feeling. If you can get to the root of What's causing the meltdown, and can redirect or distract Your child into a more positive behavior, Then the meltdowns will become far less frequent. In addition, I have found that There are two distinct types of meltdowns. The first is task avoidance Which requires immediate action sometimes even forcing their hand. The faster you do so, the sooner the child realizes that if they comply they will get rewarded. Delaying or letting it play out only teaches them that their tantrum will delay whatever it is they don't want to do. The other type is when the child is denied access to something they want. In this case time is less of a factor... Try redirecting, and if that doesn't work... Then keep them from the desired access at all costs and let them cry it out. Do NOT reward after a tantrum has begun.

posted September 5, 2013
A MyAutismTeam Member

My son is very sensory... I grab the lotion and start massaging his legs, feet, hands, arms and he eventually calms down. He loves the smell of certain lotions so I try to have those on hand. What also works is having a song he likes available, or the iPad for his videos. Good luck, find what your son enjoys. I agree with the other posts, but for a spur of the moment fix this is what works for us.

posted September 5, 2013
A MyAutismTeam Member

My son used to have multiple daily meltdowns which would leave me covered in cuts and bruises. The first major thing that helped was that we discovered, quite by accident, that he wasn't getting good sleep during the night. Oh he was sleeping plenty of hours, but apparently his body wasn't resting. We started a nightly sleeping pill, and him getting a good night sleep has been my #1 prevention method for the meltdowns and has reduced them 90%. Now he takes a melatonin pill (sold w/ the vitamins) every night an hour before bed. If you decide to try it, make sure to read the packaging as you need to take a break with another sleeping pill periodically to make sure the body doesn't think it can stop making melatonin naturally.

So that got rid of most of the meltdowns. The other thing that I've learned to do with my son is be more aware of changes in the pitch of his voice, tension in the face, a certain look in the eyes, and those things show me he's getting really stressed and ramping up to a meltdown. It doesn't matter what we're doing when that starts - I immediately drop whatever I'm trying to do and distract him with something he loves or something really silly. I've found distraction to be my #1 tool to calm the beginnings of a meltdown from turning into a full-blown one.

Hope that helps.

posted September 5, 2013
A MyAutismTeam Member

The very best resource I have ever found for dealing with behavioral difficulties is "Asperger Syndrome And Difficult Moments: Practical Solutions For Tantrums, Rage And Meltdowns" by Brenda Smith Myles. It is on DVD and is available through Amazon. I have used this for many students across the spectrum in many schools. It is excellent for parent, support worker and school staff training. It offers real and practical approaches for managing very difficult behaviors. 5 stars.

posted September 5, 2013

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