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A MyAutismTeam Member asked a question 💭
Mt Lebanon, PA

If your first born has ASD have you or will you take the risk of having another child?

February 17, 2016
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Answer Summary

Members shared deeply personal experiences about deciding whether to have more children after one child was diagnosed with autism spectrum... Read more

Members shared deeply personal experiences about deciding whether to have more children after one child was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, with outcomes varying widely from families where only one child has ASD to those where multiple children are affected. Several members emphasized that the decision ultimately comes down to whether parents feel they have the emotional capacity, time, and resources to meet all their children's needs rather than focusing solely on the risk of another diagnosis. A recurring theme was profound love and gratitude for all their children regardless of diagnosis, with many describing how siblings benefit each other through companionship, social skills practice, and teaching acceptance and patience.

A MyAutismTeam Member

I believe its a personal choice. Some believe they couldnt handle another ASD child. Others do it all the time. I have only 1 child he is ASD and im trying 2 have another I did however space them out to where my son has some independence before introducing another child.

February 22, 2016
A MyAutismTeam Member

Yes, have another. Siblings can be great social skills practice!

My first born has aspergers,

February 18, 2016
A MyAutismTeam Member

I have 4 kids 19, 17, 8 and 2 year old . My 19 year old is on the autism spectrum HFA, I believe it's really hard to say but from your story I gather you are well educated on matter, Enjoy your child and realize there may be a chance of having another child with same condition, would u or your husband be ok with it ? Seems to me like both of you are doing a great job raising your child now. Autism is scary at first and I'm not going to lie it does have many challenges as years go by, but if u think about it raising another child without Autism also has challenges just not the same .. If you are scare of having another child with Autism there's nothing wrong with doing the best u can for your son regardless if he has no siblings. I'm grateful at how my boys 19 and 17 year old have a bond and I am thankful they have each other ..

February 25, 2016
A MyAutismTeam Member

This is an incredibly difficult question to answer.

I have friends with a son on the more severe end of the spectrum.... they have decided against having more children. Not because of "risking" having another child with ASD, but because their son takes up so much of their resources (time, attention, patience, money) that they feel that they would be inadequate parents to any subsequent children.

My son is on the other end of the spectrum. We had a second child when the first was 18 months old and he is NT. It is difficult, and we have moments where we feel we are failing our second child because the older one needs more... but, predominantly, it is a blessing.

We have issues that "normal" parents do not:
Our youngest does not understand why his brother has a meltdown when he wants to play with him. He sometimes finds it funny to provoke his brother by moving cars out of line or rearranging his toys. He often tries to copy his brother's behaviour.

But, there are so many moments that make it worth it. When they make each other laugh, when they play together, the way they look out for each other, how excited they are to see each other when the older one gets home from school, the way they insist on kissing each other good night (and then wiping their faces off afterwards). The younger one showed the older one how to ride a balance bike!

I think the question shouldn't be about risk... there is no way to guarantee the health (mental or physical) or capability of a child. There are far worse things in this world than children with ASD. The question I asked myself (and keep asking myself as my husband wants us to try for a girl) is whether we could adequately provide for all our children's needs and whether my sanity (and marriage) could cope with another little person running around in my already crazy household.

I hope this helps.

February 22, 2016
A MyAutismTeam Member

My son was born and then my daughter a year later and they are both ASD but my daughter is far worse. We decided not to have anymore because we did not want to chance it. We were also getting older and thought the risks were to high if we added age. My brother is also autistic so we have it in the family but since there is no exact cause it is tough to know what to do or not do.

I know of people that have one ASD child and more that are NT, and I know of people that have 3 ASD children so it is hard to predict.

February 18, 2016

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