Connect with others who understand.

  • Learn from expert-reviewed resources
  • Real advice from people who’ve been there
  • People who understand what you’re going through
Sign Up Log In
Powered By
Real members of MyAutismTeam have posted questions and answers that support our community guidelines, and should not be taken as medical advice. Looking for the latest medically reviewed content by doctors and experts? Visit our resource section.
A MyAutismTeam Member asked a question 💭
Hillsborough, NC

My grandson will not go to sleep until he passes out and by then it could be 11 or 12. If you force a bed time he has a melt down. Last time I kept him overnight he cried himself to sleep and it took 3 hrs. I was worried and exhausted and still couldn't sleep because I was worried. I have not tried again but my daughter needs a break and I want to help. I am exhausted keeping up with him for 4 or 5 hrs and to do that until midnight would be difficult. I need suggestions please! Littleman's Nanna

June 22, 2013
 · 
Be the first to react

Answer Summary

Members rallied around a grandmother seeking help with her grandson's severe bedtime struggles during overnight visits, with the overwhelming... Read more

Members rallied around a grandmother seeking help with her grandson's severe bedtime struggles during overnight visits, with the overwhelming consensus being to try melatonin supplements after consulting his pediatrician, starting with a low dose like 1 mg to avoid grogginess. Several members shared practical strategies that have worked for their own children, including maintaining consistent bedtime routines, using weighted blankets, creating visual schedules so he knows what to expect at grandma's house, and either replicating his home routine or watching him at his own house where surroundings are familiar. A recurring theme was deep appreciation for grandparents who step up to help, encouragement to keep trying overnight visits despite the difficulty, and the understanding that children with autism often need specific routines and comfort measures to feel safe enough to sleep.

A MyAutismTeam Member

Thanks for all the useful information. I will never stop trying to help my grandson or my other 5 grandchildren. That's what grandmas do! That is what family does! I will leave no stone unturned! :)

June 25, 2013
A MyAutismTeam Member

Melatonin is wonderful. I would mainly concentrate on routine. If you keep your grandchild on a regular basis, I would have Mom talking with him before coming. I would also try to use a visual "Things to do at Grandma's chart" this way he will know what he is going to do everytime he comes and will be excited to get to mark off the chart. Also, this visual will help calm him when he is away from home because he will be able to see and know what he is going to do next at grandma's. I hope this helps. I have a set of twin girls with Autism and this is how we cope :)

June 28, 2013
A MyAutismTeam Member

If needed you can have him looked at by a pediatric sleep therapist. They gave my son some medication to help sleep. Melatonin would be a good start. Depending how big your grandson is you could try 1mg and if needed you can work your way up to 3mg. I found that the tablets you can get at a health food store that dissolve worked the best.

June 24, 2013
A MyAutismTeam Member

Would you be able to go to their home to watch him? If he has comfortable surroundings it may help him to calm when he realizes that you are not who he is used to in the evenings, but at least he has a familiar bed.

If not, detail a list of the night time routines, if there are books have them bring some with them, if he showers or bathes, do that, if he finds a movie or special toys comforting, have them bring those. Maybe a picture of his Mom so he knows she will return, make counting down the hours something new to obsess over. By sleeping, the hours fly by faster - maybe that would get him to bed. Sometimes I tell my son I will "race him to sleep" and that helps him dig in faster. But my son won't sleep without all facets of the night time routine done and if I am awake, he will be awake. If I don't sing his song or lay next to him for a little bit so he feels more comfortable, he will not sleep. Ensure you turn off your lights or go to bed around the same time or he will be tempted to get up to see what you are doing which means the night time routine must start over again.

I use 1 mg of Melatonin for my son and myself to help get to sleep on many nights due to his medication not helping him to rest and my worry to make sure he is getting rest - it is a way to help you both. Melatonin dosage is person-specific from what my Dr. said. I had started with 3 mg and when I did not like how he drifted off I tried it myself, I felt very uncomfortable drunk like feeling as I drifted to sleep, so the lower 1 mg dose is enough to relax without the odd feelings and it tones him/me down without knocking us out. Okay Melatonin with his Mom, she may have some for him already or a "trick" that helps him relax. I bought ours at WalMart no prescription needed.

Keep asking to take him overnight! I am sure his Mom really really really appreciates the help and the offers. If it weren't for my Mother In Law offering to take our son overnight, my hubby and I would not have had our first night to ourselves in six years - your help is appreciated I am certain of it! Good on you!

June 24, 2013
A MyAutismTeam Member

Has she tried a weighted blanket with him. We use melatonin too but if she's skeptical about medicines, a weighted blanket may help.

June 23, 2013

Related Questions

View All
A MyAutismTeam Member asked a question 💭
Saukville, WI

A MyAutismTeam Member asked a question 💭
Tamaqua, PA