Two of my kids were very social in that way. Having friends was important to them, but they lacked the skills to engage appropriately. Therapy helped give them skills to deal more effectively. When mine were preschool/ daycare age, I would take them out if they were incredibly unhappy, or I got the sense that the teachers resented them. But, if she likes daycare, and you think the teachers are dealing with her behaviors professionally, it may be okay to allow her to figure out through natural consequences, what behaviors will help her toward her goal of friends. Girls are generally better at this than boys. She might get there. That doesn't mean it won't be hard. Even ASD girls that learn to pass as neurotypical have lifelong struggles.

You described my son when he was in preschool at the age. Of course my son he is 17 now but when you were talking about Circle Time my son use to start screaming every day about that time. I worked at the preschool as well. There was a Teacher that worked with the Elementary School and she would come into the preschool setting and work with what the teacher notices in the classroom like sharing, throwing toys and etc. Short version that did not work I pulled him out of preschool and had his teachers fill out a behavior for form and was able to get him placed in a pre-k disabilities class where he was able to get bus service where he would ride a special needs bus. Good luck

I worked in daycare many years ago, so I know how human the teachers are. They all have their favorites, even if they say they don't. They also have certain kids they just don’t like. The kids know when this is the case. They may not be able to articulate it. Also, parents want to believe their kids are in a good place, so it's easy to pull the wool over their eyes. After seeing this first hand, I have always been quick to pull my kids out if I get the feeling they are "that kid." I have had really good daycare experiences, too. The teachers are very professional, and I took my cue from my children, who loved being there and bonded with their teachers. When they had a day where they struggled, there was no finger pointing, it just felt like we were a team trying to figure out what was best for my child. I have the benefit of hindsight now. My grown children can rell me when they were glad I pulled them out, and when they wish I had done it sooner. Always, listening to my gut was the right thing.

Thanks for your insight. Interesting you mention you pulled them out if you felt teachers getting resentful as we have experienced that this week. I just shared an email from the teacher with my daughters behavioural therapist and she was taken aback by how aggressive it was. It’s hard because my instinct is just to pull my daughter out of class to give everyone a break but there are so many good things that come from daycare that I wouldn’t want to stop either.

Thank you so much for sharing ❤️