I read your story, my son couldn't tie his shoes until 12yr a family friend watch him for a day for us, when he came home he could tie his shoes, she had taught him. One day at a time and just know you will get progress.

Get him cooking with you! There is absolutely no reason not to. It's a wonderful bonding experience and he will feel more accomplished doing so.

Also, college is certainly a possibility. And I wouldn't think too far ahead on this yet. If you're looking to start saving for college, I say DO IT! But, kids are who they are, and perhaps your son won't want to attend college right away, or ever. And if he can't attend college for one reason or another, then you have a good fund going to help him settle into his first apartment! But don't push him into thinking about college right now. Treat him like you would any other child. College is something you start saving for when they are little but only start discussing it when they hit high school.

Also, driving? There are no laws against people with autism driving. However, don't be shocked if he doesn't want to drive for quite awhile... if ever. I did not get my license until I was 23! And some people even later than that. As long as he can drive unimpaired by his diagnosis, there is no reason he should not be allowed to drive and this is true for ANYONE with ANY diagnosis. So as long as he is comfortable and willing to drive and can follow road rules, he will drive.

And as far as shoes go.... well, I may be a small minority here but I still do not know my left from my right. I am not afraid to admit that, either. :) But I do have to look at my hand to see the L shape with my pointer and thumb to determine it. So if he doesn't know his left from his right, the best way to teach him is through the way the shoes look.

The curve, obviously matches the form of your foot but most children don't even bother to notice that. So, there are other hints. For example? Most of the time the shoes brand mark will always point OUT. And if you're using velcro strapping shoes, he velcro always points OUT. So get him to learn that.

The straps point away from the other foot. The Nike Check is always on the OUTSIDE. Etc.

You can write somewhere on his shoes a R and a L so he can just look and know. Under the tongue if you want it discreet. Not sure about laws about driving but I know some kids with ASD that drive and some that don't. I wouldn't worry about it too much now. Just focus on today. And maybe driving later in life - who cares if he isn't ready right at 16. I saw on world news tonight the very first diagnosis of autism in the US, the man is now 81 and he learned to drive at 27 and still drives! I also had my daughter stir the butter and cheese into the mac and cheese after it finished boiling. After I drained the pasta, I moved the pot to the counter, got her a chair so she could reach, and she stirred it up for me. Anyway you can get your child engaged with you and feeling productive and teaching them skills! She also likes to set the table and feed the dog.
You will find your way with your son and you will create your own life map together.

The inner curves of our feet match the shape of our shoes. I still can't get my kids to figure that out.

Ty for ur answers. I let him help me already so guess I'm on the right path :)